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Shadow Work to Heal Trauma from Relationships with Narcissists
Carl Jung Created The Jungian Archetypes — Our Unconscious Selves That Can Help Us Understand Narcissism and Trauma
“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.” ~ Carl Jung
The shadow is all the parts we deny, hide or reject about ourselves. Carl Jung describes the shadow as the hidden part of our human psyche. It’s called the shadow because it hasn’t been captured by the light of our consciousness. The solution lies not in the permanent avoidance of our dark soul parts, but in their full acceptance. And quite frequently, we are reluctant to do this work because we may feel shame, embarrasment, or humiliation by shedding light into dark corners and facing what may be lurking there.
Psychology writer, Conni Biesalski says, “Shadow work is also trauma work as we heal wounded parts of ourselves — a lot of shadows were created as part of developmental or attachment trauma when we were children, when we didn’t have the resources to deal with our emotions fully and so are stored in our nervous system and in the stories we tell ourselves.”
Jungian coach Imi Lo posits, “In a nutshell, shadow work is a process of deep self-integration. Shadows are the parts of ourselves that we have disowned, dislodged, and suppressed due to past trauma, social conditioning, and other reasons. According to Jung, the shadow is the unknown dark side of our personalities.”
The primary benefit of doing this work following narcissistic informed trauma is that you will learn to surround yourself with people who love you, support you, rather than the opposite. People often get attracted to people who treat them badly because of unintegrated shadows. This is a common dynamic in coupling with a disordered Cluster B person, and one of the goals of recovery is to end that pattern.
The 12 Jungian Archetypes
Sage, Innocent, Explorer, Ruler, Creator, Caregiver, Magician, Hero, Rebel, Lover, Jester, & Orphan
We all have these archetypes within us, and by becoming more aware of them, it will help you in your self-discovery. Shadow work is…